For as much as we celebrate the cumulative highs of this past year, we still have to take note of all the silly lows that have gone hand in glove throughout hip-hop in 2014. Never forget these moments, because as they say, we must remember the past so history does not repeat its mistakes. And man, what mistakes there were this year! Hip-hop, we’ve gotta do better in the 2015! With that said, we bring to you hip-hop’s most spectacularly terrible fails in 2014.
10. T.I. PICKS A FIGHT WITH FLOYD MAYWEATHER Look, I get it Tip, you’re just trying to defend your honor amidst the rumors swirling at the time of boxing champ, Floyd Mayweather, sleeping with your wife, Tiny. But dude, for as truly besmirched as you may feel, you do realize you’re trying to throw hands with a guy that gets paid millions to chin check other dudes. Floyd Mayweather is undeniably a boxing legend and T.I. out here at Fatburger practically begging for a beatdown so bad it’d knock the Southern drawl outta his speech pattern. I’d post the “footage” of the whole melee, but really, it’s about as clear to discern and understand as a Young Thug hook.
9. KANYE SIGNS FAKE YEEZYS
Now this fail isn’t really on Kanye, but instead on the poor fan that asked him to sign his Yeezys – only to have Mr. West himself call him out for presenting him with a pair faker than Iggy Azalea’s rapping accent (we’ll get to that later). A real pair of Air Yeezys can fetch up to thousands of dollars, but to catch this kind of embarrassment? Priceless.
8. MACKLEMORE CATCHES THE IRE OF THE JEWISH COMMUNITY WITH QUESTIONABLE DISGUISE
Back in May this year, everybody’s favorite thrift-shopping emcee drew the ire of the Jewish community and more with his choice of disguise while performing at the “Spectacle: The Music Video” at Seattle’s EMP Museum. And though Mack vehemently denied dressing up as a Jewish stereotype, one look at the pic above kinda makes you scratch your head on this one. Sure, dude very well may have had no ill intention with this costume, but one look in the mirror should immediately have him second-guessing. No matter, as actor Seth Rogan summed up the debacle quite succinctly by tweeting: “First you trick people into thinking you’re a rapper, now you trick them into thinking you’re Jewish?” Get ’em Seth.
7. BATTLE EMCEE, DAYLYT, TRIES TO POOP ON STAGE
This one really was tough to stomach, but as much as this bizarre happening sounds too terrible and weird to ever be true, we remember that battle rapper, Daylyt, was involved and can now come to terms with its truth. See, crazy antics are the norm for Daylyt, but this buffoonery surpasses any and all he’s come up with in the past. Normally I’d be utterly grossed out about this, but then I realized that if he did poop on stage, the only thing that’d come out would be his rap career. HI-YOOO!
6. DRAKE’S AIRBALL
Damn Drizzy, did those Jimmy Brooks-skills not translate well into your rap career?
5. BOBBY SHMURDA CATCHES A CASE
Bobby Shmurda had one successful year the way he had everybody and their momma’s momma Shmoney Dancing. Too bad he had to close out 2014 by Shmoney Dancing his way into jail. Life really did imitate art a little too closely here as the rapper was seized in a drug trafficking sting in early December and caught serious charges of attempted murder and weapons and drug possession. If Bobby does end up beating this case, I’ve got some advice for him: GET UP OUT THE TRAP HOUUUUSSSSE!
4. 50 CENT THROWS FIRST PITCH AT METS GAME
Curtis. Dawg. Stick to throwing wads of hundreds in the air at the strip club. Matter fact, you were better at pitching Vitamin Water.
3. DIDDY BEATS UP DRAKE
Is there anything more Charmin extra quilted soft than an altercation involving someone named Puffy hitting someone named Aubrey? Apparently this dust up stemmed from Drake allegedly jacking one of Diddy’s beats and using it as his own. For his troubles, Drizzy caught the furious hands of Puff, suffering a bum shoulder and severely injuring his ego in the process.
2. SOLANGE ATTACKS JAY Z IN AN ELEVATOR
TMZ dropped the bomb on everything with this monumental footage of Solange absolutely going 100% Mortal Kombat on Jay Z. As you can see from the video above, she showed promise as an MMA fighter by mixing her combos up with hand and leg strikes. It seems that Jay Z had 99 problems with Solange being one that night. And as for Solange, she scored more hits in that elevator than in the booth.
1. IGGY AZALEA
Whether it be absurdly dismissing hip-hop royalty and acting above the conversation of the cultural appropriation she is aptly accused of, getting into silly social media beefs with other artists, to becoming a meme late in the year over her “freestyle” skills or lack thereof, or even passive aggressively mocking hip-hop culture with her “black-cent” on songs, Iggy Azalea equally matched her meteoric success in 2014 with titanic fails of her own. No artist this year has been as polarizing and has drawn more criticism from within the hip-hop community than Miss Azalea, and rightfully so. Her star is nowhere near fading, but with the recent flack she’s taken, we’ll see how she bounces back in 2015.
Honorable mention: WHATEVER YOUNG THUG SAYS IN THAT “LIFESTYLE” HOOK
Look man, not even Dr. Doolittle understands whatever it is that Young Thug is saying in Rich Gang’s “Lifestyle” hook. Somebody please buy the man a vowel or something. Dude sound like a kid who’s about to get spanked but tries desperately to explain himself outta it.